By Sharon Emephia
Some humans are Indeed so amazing, with hearts saturated and mayonated with pure love, which makes them addictive and truly leaves an indelible mark in the hearts and lives of people they come close to, irrespective of how brief the interaction lasted for.
When folks like these get involved in a love relationship, they usually leave a huge positive impression in the hearts and minds of everyone in close radius to the person they are actually in a Relationship with, due to how kind, loving and caring they are, and so even if the Relationship between them and whoever they started out being in a Relationship with doesn’t eventually lead to marriage, (which in itself is usually confusing to the folks around, since this person in question is so amazing), it’s still so difficult for the folks they got close to while in that relationship (that is, their date’s family and close friends), to just severe their own personal interactions with such an awesome personality.
While this can be understood, it also has to be handled with great care, especially when these folks eventually start off new relationships or even get married to different people.
To keep mentioning a certain ‘EX’ in almost every conversation with someone you are currently in a relationship with, isn’t a cool thing because on the long run it could make the person you are dating presently, feel you aren’t really over your “EX” and they may decide to not take their relationship with you seriously, or they could even decide to end things with you.
Referring to an ‘EX” as your Best friend while you are in a Relationship with someone else or probably even married to someone else, is infact weird. If you are married, especially, and are in a proper marriage, your spouse ought to be your Best friend!
You broke up with that “EX” for a reason, so keep it that way. Nobody moves forward, while they keep looking behind.
If the break up with your “EX” was out of a mistake or one sided, and you both reason you can get back together and make it work, then by all means do. But if one out of both of you is already in another relationship or already married, then just let it slide and trust that you will find love elsewhere, and also remember to apply the good lessons learnt in your previous relationship with your ‘EX”.
Also, if your sibling has an ‘EX” that was so amazing while dating your sibling, and there was naturally a certain bond between you and that “EX Boyfriend” or “EX Girlfriend”, it’s okay, it’s fine, but when your sibling gets involved seriously with someone else, either in a new relationship or marriage, you have to be sensitive to the feelings of this new person in your sibling’s life, by toning down your interactions with that “Amazing EX”.
This is a wise and smart thing to do so as not to generate any feeling of insecurity or jealousy on both sides, as the case may be. Humans are emotional creatures and some folks could be very sensitive, so wisdom should be applied in all our relationships and interactions.
It is wise and smart to also know that certain ‘EXs’ cannot be just friends afterwards, especially in a situation where the break up wasn’t on mutual agreement, one partner still wanted the relationship; or if there outright disrespect or disloyalty on the part of one partner while the relationship was still on, because no sane or worthy self respecting adult would want to remain friends with someone who intentionally disrespected them while they were in a love relationship.
In conclusion, being friends with an ‘EX” isn’t a bad thing, as long as clear boundaries are set, and the decision to “Remain Friends” does not impact negatively on your present Love Relationship or Marriage.
Until next time, keep Loving, Keep Living and Keep Living your Dreams!